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Dear Mom, You are perfect just the way you are!

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Dr Geeta Mathew – ‘Cheer up, Mom!’

Dear Mom,

Covid 19 turned our worlds topsy turvy. We are hanging in there, amidst virtual schooling, day-care shutdowns and uncertainty, the 2020-21 keywords. Allow joy to break through fear and chaos. Routinize the day so our babies know what to expect. Grab stolen moments – bake goodies, do dance routines, a science experiment. Watch the smile on your child’s face. Allot specific spaces for everyone.

Put up ‘Do not disturb’ signs during work calls. ‘This too shall pass.’ We will soon step out into a better world. So, cheer up, Mom. Tomorrow is another day.

From the Mom of a Mom

Aditi Prakash – ‘Just do it’

Dear Mom,

All moms receive so much advice from other moms, from grand moms, from everyone who thinks they know more and they know better. And on everything. From what to do, how to take care of their child, what to feed them, how to hold them, what to make them wear, and what not to do.

Well, my advice is simple. Be happy. Do things that make you happy. If its food or exercise, reading or dancing, sleeping or watching the telly. Do it. Make time for your happiness.

Even if at the cost of less time with your baby or child. Even if the others at home look at you strangely. Even if it means you eat dinner and then give your child their meal – because that way, you can read or sing or tell them a story without feeling like you are about to starve!

It’s not being selfish. It’s not wrong. No judgement.

Because remember – a happy mom raises a happy baby!

Gudy Narang – ‘Just a bend, not the end’

Dear Moms,

Wouldn’t it be a cliché if I ask ‘How are you doing?’ For all the roller-coaster rides we have been through for the past one year. Instead, the right question will be, ‘how did you do it?’

I actually felt relaxed mostly when the sudden lockdown was announced last March. Though clouded with animosity and unpredictability, the new found freedom, it was a fresh round of O2.

With the advent of technology, work from home, work throughout the day, no outing, no meeting of new people, its taxing. But I know we are all fighting a war of a different kind.

The optimist in me asks me to see the green pasture, which is mainly spending time with family and the new found “Working as a Family”.

To all the beautiful Moms out there “Relax Sweetheart It’s just a Bend not the End

Divya Mathew – ‘Everything does not need to be perfect every single day!’

Dear Mom,

Has it been a year already? As a mother of an adorable 9-year-old, I never thought the pandemic would change all our lives so dramatically. A moment ago, I was making elaborate plans of travel and fun stuff to do and the very next moment, I was struggling to balance different tasks all at the same time. Who would have thought that stepping out for an ice cream would be such a rare treat? To top it all, I also had to make sure Zaara was learning right and staying constructively engaged and busy through the long days. But the one thing besides the constant support of my parents and the quiet patience of my husband that keeps me sane, is knowing that everything does not need to be perfect, every single day. It is ok not to tick off all items of your ‘to do’ list.

To all moms out there, we are all doing a fabulous job. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Be patient. Take a deep breath. Carve out some ‘me time’ and remember that this too shall pass!

From one mom to another

Divya Mathew, mom of Zaara

Meeta Sajwan – ‘Go for happy, not perfect’

Dear Mothers!

Most women, especially mothers, like the idea of being perfect in every scenario. During these challenging times, I have learnt to “Go for happy not perfect”.

Being a housewife, I look after most of the things at home. My husband tries to step in whenever possible for him.

Following virtual classroom routine was really challenging. I make sure that my son (6+ yrs.) sits with the laptop and his books are arranged on his study table with all the resources required for that day. There are times when he comes up and says “I don’t want to attend the next class”, which is generally non-academic. I do check if he completes the missed class later during the day. He misses being around other students. I try to reassure him “It’s temporary. It’s going to get better”

Most of all I remind myself to focus on positives. Also, self-care is something we all should consider.

Aditi Prakash – ‘It’s OK to not be OK’

Dear Mom,

My advice is that it’s ok to cry.

Bringing up a child is a very fulfilling and a joyous journey, but it is an emotional rollercoaster. There will be times when you feel helpless, annoyed, frustrated and exhausted – and at these times it doesn’t make you less of a woman or less of a mother, to break down and cry.

It’s normal.

Here I am using cry as a placeholder for letting out your emotions in your way. Some prefer kickboxing in the gym, writing in their journal, complaining to a mom or a friend for an hour, and so on.

Let it out. Don’t hold it in.

Jessy Cherian – ‘ It’s ok to be selfish and ensure your happiness’

Dear Mom,

Hope you know you are doing a great job. The last one year hasn’t been easy and the situation is much grimmer now. Just take a long breath or a break if you must. Believe me, this helps. I have a 11-year-old wonderful boy and he has been so accommodating in the last one year. They are going through a lot too and it helps that we give them space and not be on their back always.

I can’t emphasize enough on the benefits of taking care of yourself first. It’s ok to be selfish and ensure your happiness. Do things that relax and make you happy. When you are happy and healthy you can take care of your family better. I lost weight, not on medication anymore for my diabetes and generally am much better health wise. Focus on what you think you need to improve to be the best version of yourself.

Start small and don’t forget to incentivize yourself on achieving what you set out to do. A little online retail therapy has never hurt anyone, has it?

Hang in there moms. This too shall pass.

From one rocking mom to another.

Jessy Cherian, Mom of Adrian

Smriti Raghunandan – ‘Smile, you’re your best cheerleader!’

There’ll be days when the sun is warm and bright, but there’ll be days when you don’t want to get out of bed. And there’ll certainly be days when you cannot keep it all together. On these days, step back, simplify and breathe. Look at yourself in the mirror and smile. Smile because you are your own cheerleader, and the best one there is!

Rachel Lobo – ‘Don’t just survive the present –Thrive!’

Dear Mom,

You’re navigating an unprecedented situation and it’s overwhelming. Call me Captain obvious, but being a mom is tough. Do the best you can, and I can tell you this: “You’re doing enough”.

Over the past year I have learnt to be kind to myself and realized I’m not alone in this! Thanks to my adorable 6- and 2-year-old boys who taught me to cope and adjust. Learn to be happy and a messy mum and you will still be their superhuman. We are in trying times, to say the least so-give yourself a break, make choices and have no guilt, ask for help, slow down. Be every source of entertainment for your child and family, but don’t forget to have time for YOU.

There is no way to perfectly master or balance everything being thrown at us right now, take a breath, momma, and give YOURSELF some grace. Your kids will remember the ways you made it fun. Make memories so you could cherish a lifetime. When you have to pick, because at some point you will, choose a way to connect with your little munchkins-Pick laughing, snuggling, being silly.

There is no secret to be a perfect mother but a gazillion ways to be a damn good one. In the process, there’s a person in there, don’t forget about her. Value your own well-being as this will enable the best version of being a “happy mommy, happy babies”. Don’t just survive the present -Thrive!!

Rachel Lobo, mom of adorable 6- and 2-year-old boys

Sriranjani Hadigal – ‘You can’t pour from an empty cup!’

If there’s one thing I realized in the last year, is ‘You can’t pour from an empty cup!’ As we navigated a tumultuous 2020, this has been my go-to mantra. Self-care has been the most important part of my coping mechanism. For me it was an hour’s workout followed by meditation that helped me keep it together and be there for my toddler son & rest of my family.

It’s a partnership! Raising a happy child, navigating a job change whilst managing caregiving responsibilities wouldn’t have been possible without equal partnership from my husband.

Learn something new! I picked up flower arrangement as a hobby. Apart from the joy of learning, it created positive vibes at different corners at my home.

Aditi Prakash – ‘Every phase passes’

Dear Mom,

I just wanted to say, in the life of a parent, every phase passes.

The fun ones and the happy ones.

The ones when you can’t wait for them to get over.

The ones that leave you questioning your capability as a mother.

When your child is unwell and you feel helpless.

When your heart bursts with pride when you child does something you think is amazing.

When that hug is just what you wanted.

When your child refuses to hug you.

When s/he is refusing to eat or sleep.

When s/he is refusing to wake up for school.

It’s a phase. It shall pass.

As a mother of an almost 10-year-old, I can say, this too shall pass. Enjoy the phases you love and don’t stress too much when the unpleasant phase starts. Because, it’s a phase. It shall pass.

Shovana Jana – ‘You are not alone’

Dear Moms,

Do you feel you are the only one who wakes up the earliest in your household just to get that 5 minutes of quiet? Do you wonder if your little one rules the home? Do you wonder if you are the only one who for the 50th time during a Teams call puts yourself on mute and doesn’t switch on the video, because there is just too much happening in the background? Do you feel you are the only one whose calls automatically get disconnected because your little one has decided they want to see Peppa pig’s new episode? Well! Let me tell you, you are not alone!

I have found my lost TV remote in the laundry basket, spoons under the couch, my charger in the kitchen and my comb in a colourful box full of lego! These are crazy times indeed and who would have thought we would all have to go through such days. While keeping myself insanely sane during the lockdown was not an easy job, the one thing that made me calm down and take a deep breath was when I saw their smiling faces. It made me forget about my lost sunglasses and all the other things I haven’t been able to do.

Here’s to all the moms who are still searching for their missing pair of slippers!

Cheers!

Shovana Jana, mom of 2 adorably naughty children

Rashi Sodhani – ‘Learning cannot stop’

DEAR MOMS

BEING A MOM IS TOUGH……YES..BUT A MOM IN PANDEMIC IS EVEN MORE TOUGHER…TRUE…

But sooner we accept and start focusing on solutions, the wiser we become. Learning for the children should not be stopped. Everyone should spend more and more time with your little ones to make them ready for the future. Think of it this way – that this pandemic gives you a chance to spend more time with your kids.

All mommies take charge of the overall development of your children by any means like reach out to experts or teachers, make your doubts clear …but let children grow and learn. Because no pandemic can stop a mother to raise her kids like she wants.

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